The Things They Carried
by ElwynZ
Summary: Set in an AU where the Alliance Fleet liberated Shanxi much later and the battle devolves into a ground war with human guerrilla fighters engaging the Hierarchy all over the planet. This is a book written by Primarch Adrien Victus reminiscing about his experiences in the FCW, written after the reaper war. Mass Effect adaptation of Tim O'Brien's sublime book of the same title.


First Lieutenant Jannus Octavian carried messages from a woman named Ania, a girl he met during basic training back on Palaven. The messages spoke of missing him, of the carnal knowledge they shared of each other. But they were not _love_ letters, as much as Octavian would wish it so. But he hoped, so he kept them filed under "Classified" in his omnitool. Every evening, he would help his men set up a perimeter and construct their prefabs. He would pretend to be taking inventory; calibrating a turret, or perhaps just act like he was playing a game on his omnitool. In this way, Octavian would spend the last hours each day just pretending. He imagined painting his colony markings on Ania, tracing the ornate, intricate, soft beige patterns over her simple, harsh red ones. He imagined bonding with her, holding hands and touching foreheads like he had almost done back in training but never found the courage to actually do.

More than anything, Lieutenant Octavian wanted Ania to love him as he loved her. But the messages, that still came once in every few communications bursts, were elusive on the subject of love. They were chatty and conversational; occasionally they spoke of lust or longing. She would often mention her eagerness to "make love" with him again. But the Lieutenant understood that "making love" was only a euphemism for sex – stress release – and did not mean what he sometimes pretended it meant. As dusk fell, he would close his messages, and slowly, a bit distracted, check on his men, patrolling the perimeter. Then, when it got dark, he would retreat into his prefab and watch Shanxi's moonless night and imagine.

* * *

The things they carried were largely determined by necessity. Among the necessities or near-necessities were standard-issue omnitools, dextro rations, anti-histamine shots, holotags, combat knives, talon files, lighters, translators, and energy cells. Together, these items weighed about 5 to 10 pounds, depending on one's habits or rates of metabolism. Hectus Varraka, a big man, carried extra rations; he was especially fond of Petran rations, and hoarded them in the rare cases when they were available. Deculonia Maxidus, whom everyone called Dess, was obsessed with keeping herself clean. She carried polish for her facial plates, an abrasive brush for her sharp teeth, and several bars of something called _soap_ she had found on a human corpse and taken a liking to.

Tiberius Laetus, who hated the war and was scared, carried sedatives until he was shot in the head outside the small town of Haven. By necessity, they all carried Armax Arsenal Predator series armour and a matching breathing helmet, which weighed several dozen pounds in all. They each carried a set of civvies. Only a couple carried undergarments. Dess carried covers for her feet because her boots were too small and would scrape uncomfortably against her talons otherwise. Until he was shot, Tibierus Laetus carried a bottle of hallex, which for him was a necessity. Numescius Granian carried an actual, physical diary instead of an omnitool log or datapad. Kavus carried his book of ancient scriptures given to him by his father, who was a Spirit Conduit back on his home colony. As well, he carried his ancestors' distaste of the Hierarchy, a sentiment that remained well after the colonial separatists had been crushed under the might of the Turian military. Even now, Kavus refuses to tell the others his clan name due to the stigma attached to it.

Because the humans laid mines everywhere, each man had to carry backup shield generators, which weighed 2 pounds each while inactive. Because you could be killed so quickly from blood loss on a foreign planet, each man carried an emergency compress bandage that could be applied quickly. Because the planet was humid and it rained often, soldiers carried a camouflaged poncho that could be worn or used to keep water from leaking into their prefabs at night. They were quite inconvenient and could restrict movement, but they were incredibly worth it. For instance, when Tiberius was shot, they used his poncho to wrap up his corpse, then to carry him across a field, then to lift him into the shuttle that took him away.

* * *

They were called legs, or spurs.

To carry something was to 'crest it', as when Lieutenant Jannus Octavian crested his love for Ania up the hills and through the cities. In its literal sense, to crest meant to walk, or march, but it implied burdens far beyond that.

What they carried was partially a function of rank, and partly of field specialty.

As First Lieutenant and platoon leader, Jannus Octavian carried a compass and GPS system on his omnitool, a book of human code systems, and a Brawler pistol that weighed 2 pounds with a fresh ammo block. He also carried a strobe light, flares, and a responsibility for the lives of the men and women under him.

As a tech specialist, Marius Surril carried a top-of-the-line Serrice Council Savant omni-tool, an impressive piece of technology with functions and programs for everything from predicting the number of shots left in an ammo block to computing differential calculus.

As a medic, "Klatha" Helgius carried a bag filled with sedatives, blood transfusions, surgical tools, and plate lotion and all the things a medic must carry, for a total weight of 18 pounds.

As he was almost as big as a krogan, and therefore a machine gunner, Hectus Varraka carried the Phoenix, which weighed 30 pounds without its massive ammo block, but was almost always loaded. In addition, Varraka carried a shotgun that he kept secured at the small of his back, which weighed another 10 pounds.

As privates or corporals, most of them were common spurs and carried the standard Crossfire assault rifle. The weapon weighed 7.5 pounds unloaded, 8.2 pounds with its specialized alloy ammo block. Whenever it was available, they also carried Crossfire maintenance gear – rods and brushes and tubes of oil – all of which weighed about a pound. Among the spurs, some carried the M-100 Grenade Launcher, 5.9 pounds unloaded, a reasonably light weapon, except for the ammunition, which was heavy. A single round weighed half a pound. The launchers carried 10 rounds at a time, and most were content with that. But Tiberius, who was scared and found solace in powerful weapons, was carrying 30 rounds on him when he was shot and killed outside Haven, more than 20 pounds of ammunition, plus the armor and the breather helmet and the rations and the water and the hallex and all the rest, plus the unweighed fear and hate of the war. He was dead weight. Kavus, who saw it happen, said it was like watching a rock fall, or a great bird dropping its prey – just boom, then down – nothing like the vids where the dead soldier does spins and flips – not like that, Kavus said, the poor bastard just flat-out fell. Boom. Down. Nothing else. Lieutenant Cross felt Tiberius' pain. He blamed himself. They stripped off Tiberius' water and ammo, all the heavy things, and someone said the obvious, the man's dead, and Marius set up a comms beacon to report one Heirarchy KIA and to request a shuttle. They wrapped Tiberius in a poncho and carried him out of the town and to a field, and put down a barrier around the LZ. Lieutenant Octavian kept to himself. He pictured Ania's red clan markings, thinking of how he loved her more than anything, more than his own men, and now Tiberius was dead because he could not stop thinking about her. When the shuttle arrived, they carried Lavender aboard. Afterwards, they razed Haven. The town had long since been abandoned, but it still felt _good_ to watch the buildings burn.

In addition to their normal weapons – the Pheonix, and the Crossfire – they carried whatever presented itself, or whatever seemed appropriate as a means of killing humans or staying alive. At various times, in various situations, they carried Vipers and Batarian Terminators and zipguns and captured Lancers and Gorgons and Avalanches and black market mods and omniblades and explosives. Every third or fourth soldier carried anti-personnel mines – 3.5 pounds with burying device and thermal cloaking. They all carried grenades – a few ounces each. They each carried a beacon to summon fire support from the Hierarchy dreadnoughts and cruisers orbiting the planet. Some carried gas grenades. Some carried polonium rounds. They carried all they could bear, and then some, including a silent awe for the sheer, terrible power of the things they carried.

* * *

**A/N: Hey guys! This is just an idea I had floating around, so I fished out my old book for reference and banged it out. I will likely not update this much, but once the idea seized me I *had* to write something. Leave a comment! Let me know if its worth continuing.**

**Mass Effect, its universe, and its associated characters are property of Bioware and EA. The Things they Carried is the intellectual property of its author, Tim O'Brien, and his publisher, Mariner books.**


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